Mamma Mia? Show the way to Paradise

 

                                    Varghese Pamplanil

 

The butthole for sex

A well preserved 120 million year old fossil found in Liaoning province in northeastern China of Psittacosaurus carnivorous dinosaur, roughly of the size of Labrador,came with a well intact cloaca – an opening found in non-mammals. This opening served as a funnel from which urine and poop was excreted. And yes, it also served as the spot where sex happened . That is right, folks. Dinosaurs were having anal sex before it became a rage among humans.

 

Would you, Marilyn Taplin (cf. your comments in CCV dated 21-01-21) point out the scriptures that support your  outrageous views.  When did your God bless you with the “Revelation ”— “God made vaginal intercourse; Satan made oral and anal sex”. Do you mean that a few thrusts into the vagina by the male penis is the divine prescribed way of havingsexual intercourse?. Are you sure that the Missionary Position where the female is required to lie prone on her back as a passive partner with the male on top of her is the scripture mode of sex?But the stark realty;  modern woman is not satisfied by this one way traffic; she demands orgasm. If the male partner cannot satisfy her, she has many options for achieving orgasm.

 

I have my sympathies to your male partner, if any, who has to suffer your joyless“rationed sex”. If he has balls and libido, he will seek satisfaction elsewhere, no doubt.

Men with libido will seek the company of Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, Marylyn Monroe, Elizabeth Taylor and such other beauties even in  the nether world. A male who doesn’t desire sex with a healthy and attractive woman is a eunuch.

 

To my knowledge the worst Satanic sex maniac of the day  is Franco Mulakkal. This sexual pervert reportedly forced a helpless nun: that too a “Bride of Christ” —to satisfy his craving for forms of sex. The other notorious  sex perverts were Borgia Pope Alexander VI, who had sex even with his own daughter,  in addition to his many mistresses and top pick Roman prostitutes; Pope John XII who was made a pope at the age 18, turned the Vatican into a  brothel; he was stabbed to death by an irate husband while the “Holy”Pope  was found mounting his wife in the “Holy” Vatican. There were many other womaniser “Holy Popes”. (Taplin may well read my articles in CCV on the subject).

 

But if Taplin prefers to read only the fairy tales in the Bible, it is her choice. My humble suggestion to you Taplin, make a nocturnal visit to the sleeping quarters in convents, seminaries and bed rooms of clerics. Your eyes will pop up on witnessing“holy” sex orgies going on in these“holy” places?

 

Clement (150-215 CE) says: “Carpocratian Christians, when they gather for feasts, have sexual intercourses when they will and with whom they will; they think wives should be common property”. ( I have more records on this subject).

 

Celsius (171 CE) observes“Christians are naive and unintelligent; their religion is spread by children and stupid women. Such naivety made them to believe in magic with which Christianity is replete. Gullible Christians also believe Jesus is GOD”

 

And his deputies are abnormally concerned with what happens among Christians in the matter of sex. He seemed to be not bothered about the sexual proclivities of non-Christians numbering more than 600 crores around the world. The unlucky Christians are to be satisfied with joyless sex.

 

The Christian God appears to be an incompetent moron unable to punish, at least, his chosen(Un) Holy Popes who had kept castrated boys for sexual perversions. Why doesn’t he  punish the obnoxious sexual maniacs hiding in the dark labyrinths of Vatican. Satan seems to be more powerful than the “Three in One; One in Three God(s)”, the Father, the Son and the “Feminine”Holy Spirt (cf. the Gospel of John) when it comes to SEX?

 

Jacob Macwan with his magician’s wand could unravel the mystery of the alleged sexual intercourse between Eve and the Serpent; her roaring orgasm/her pregnancy/birth of Cain. What type of Serpent penis entered Eve’s  vagina Macwan? To my limited knowledge serpents don’t have penises and human sperms. Snakes entwine themselves for sex and produce eggs. How then Cain could  be the  son of a serpent? But Christians are notorious in believing the outlandish fairy tales in the Bible!

 

Arnold J. Toynbee in his 12 Volumes magnum opus “A Study of History says: “ The Fall in response to the temptation to eat of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil symbolises the acceptance of a challenge to abandon an already  achieved integration and to venture upon a fresh integration. The expulsion from the Garden of Eden into an unfriendly world in which the Woman must bring forth children in sorrow and the Man must eat bread in the sweat of his face is the ordeal of acceptance of a fresh challenge. The Paradise called Eden is the hunter-gather mode of life without labour; a carefree life of consuming the bounties of nature and the equitable sharingof food, especially the sharing of females. When the human kind opted for a settled  agrarian way of life in the delta of Euphrates and Tigris, the ruling class of kings and priests misappropriated the goodies of life ESPECIALLY HEALTHYWELL ENDOWED FEMALES . The proletariat had to be satisfied with the left overs. It is, therefore, logical that the deprived are nostalgic of the hunter-gathererway of life in the Eden.

 

According to Toynbee, “the sexual intercourse between Adam  and Eve, is an act of social creation. It bears  fruit in the birth of two sons who impersonate two nascent civilisations: Abel the keeper of sheep and Cain the tiller of the ground”

 

There is another scenario presented in the Study of History ante. “Ages ago a band of NAKED, houseless, fireless humans started from their warm home in the torrid zone and pushed steadily northward from the beginning of spring to the end of summer. They never guessed that they had left the land of constant warmth until in September when they began to feel uncomfortable chill at night. Day by day it grew worse. Not knowing the cause,they travelled this way or that to escape. Some went southward, but only a handful returned to their former home. There they resumed the old life, and became savages. Those wandered in other directions all perished except one small band. Some tried to find shelter by digging holes in the ground, some gathered branches and leaves to make huts and warm beds; some wrapped in the skins of the beasts they had slain and they  took steps towards civilisation”.

 

Please note that cloths were meant to protect body from the harsh elements especially bitter cold. Hiding genitals from the sight of others was of the lowest priority.

 

The different organs of the body have roles to play. So one should not be ashamed of the genitals. During my visits to Santa Clara Library Cupertino, CA where Headquarters of Apple is situated, I have come across young women loitering in the lawns of Santa Clara Library frolicking. They wore the skimpiest of “shorts”; their attractive full developed breasts straining to get out of the brief tops they wore.  Nobody appeared to be unhinged in seeing bare legs and full grown breasts. In the fiction “Prize” Irving Wallace says: in a nudist colony, no male gets an erection.

 

According to Irish  bishop James Ussher, creation began on 23 October 4004 BCE, Adam was created on 28 October. A tired God rested and had a deep sleep on the 29^th. When he woke on 30, he found Adam unhappy without a woman, so he created Eve —could be after 31^st or so. The couple were expelled from the Garden of Eden on November 10.

 

If  the yarns of both Ussher and Macwan are right, one should marvel at the super-sexualty of Eve within a week of her creation; becoming  a voluptuous female to be enticed by Satan in the guise of a young man; had sexual intercourse with the Serpent that gave her roaring orgasm ;got pregnant pronto with the seed of the Satanic Serpent; delivered Cain in a jiffy and again had sex with Adam, got pregnant with the seed of Adam and delivered Abel. All these happened within the span of one week. Thus, Eve could snatch a fulfilling sex with the Serpent and Adam consecutively and could enjoy great sex. Mind you, Eve is the ONLY FEMALE who could achieve an orgasm by mating with a Serpent as well as with Adam, could give birth to Cain and Abel in 7 days or so.My head has become dizzy. Some bible pundit can enlighten as to the size of the penis of the Serpent that could enter the full developed vagina of Eve to  give her orgasm?

 

Sorry a  dumb “faithful”  is not supposed to ask questions. But I am not any blind believer of fantasy stories.

 

Between 5 to 7 millions years ago, in Africa, emerged ape like creatures —  protohumans —who walked habitually on two legs. The humans — homosapian— evolved in Africa 2.5 millions ago. The humans were not created by any deity/god/Yahweh as written in a book called Bible. It is high time that this tissue of fables is consigned to the waste bin.

 

The difference between the hairy apes and the hairless upright walking human hairless ape is that the latter’s genitals are upfront unlike the other mammals with their  genital at the rear buttocks. In all probability the human male of old would have mounted the female from the rear like his ape cousin. How and when frontal mating happened is not known to me.The early humans mated from young age probable in the open, as is the case of tribes living in the interior forests of Amazon. Mating would have happened at random. Mothers would have been in charge of children since no particular male parent could be identified. No Pope/Cardinal/ bishop/priest was there to direct how the penis should  enter the vagina. No taboo too except sex with mensural females. Matings could not have been much different from other animals except for the frontal entry. Sexual intercourse  could have been another mundane activity like pissing.

 

The church insists onthe Missionary Position mode of sexual intercourse. The aim could be to make the female subservient to the male.

 

The earlier humans mated without any marriage ceremony . The male would have enjoyed fondling female breasts and other areas of the female body for mutual pleasure. The male would also have enjoyed the smell and sight of the orifices and bulges of the female body. The female could also have made reciprocal steps. So grow up Taplin and others of her type or go to Hell?

 

The Hebrew Bible was compiled as late as 900 BCE with Genesis 2 copying Sumerian creation myth. Remember Abraham hailed from Ur. It was during the  Babylonian Captivity,Genesis 1 was written to spite the Babylonians.

 

It was the guilt ridden sexual fiend debauchee fornicator Augustine of Hippo who propositioned that children born out of pleasurable sex carry the odium of Original Sin. Since the fictional Eve covered her private part with fig leaves after sex with Adam, Augustine propositioned that the seat of Original Sin is Eve’s vulva. To Augustine the knowledge that Adam got was his CARNAL KNOWLEDGE OF EVE—“Adam knew Eve”. Means that Adam had a good f..k.

 

In one go, the precious gift of nature viz., sexual instinct,  absolutely necessary for the perpetuation of the human species was derided and condemned as sinful and  ugly act. The Church latched with alacrity the misguided and preposterous proposition of an illicit fornicator Augustine and succeeded in inculcating the poison of sin and guilt into the psyche of its stupid believers, more so into the brains of stupid women. Since no normal male or female can desist from sexual intercourse —a tonic for good health —every Christian is a condemned Sinner?

 

Every woman is beautiful in her own way. The female body  is the ultimate of human biological evolution.

 

Hating the body as the abode of evil and a source of temptation and sin seemed to be peculiarity of the sick Catholic mindset. So also the vehement opposition to bodily pleasure. The glorification of poverty for the proletariat is another Catholic trait.The aim of the clerics, apparently, is reservation of all sorts of pleasures exclusively for them— selves; the dumb sheep believer should be excluded from any type of enjoyment. This world and its joys are for ecclesiastical.

 

Sensible persons are unable to understand the obsession of the Church about the sexuality of its followers to the exclusion of grave matters such superstition, ignorance, social turmoil, environmental degradation, extreme poverty in many parts of the world, the pandemic Coronavirus and such matters. The clerics better keep off the f…ing activities of its members; let them have it standing, women on top, entry through the rear and any other orifices. Shalom.